In early 2018 Cwis released a survey called ‘The Origins of ABDL’. More than 1,500 members of the community took part. An in-depth analysis is coming to the new Abysitter.com. For now, enjoy the explainer video used in his 2018 class at CAPCON.

Intro

Allow me to preface this by admitting that I am not a licensed surveyologist. I don’t have an advanced degree in sociology, or psychology, or something of that sort. I’m probably not the best-positioned individual to take up the mantle of surveying the community. Yet, in January 2018 I did just that. Nearly 1,600 members of the community took the time to answer the questions. (Contrast that to my first survey, in 2011, in which 100 of my blog readers participated).

Why? Well, what I do have is a blog that, over a period of 12 years, has attracted a loyal following within the ABDL community. In fact, the year before, Abysitter.com had received its millionth page view. During that time I’ve received hundreds of messages from people pondering the reasons behind their love for diapers and littlespace. I had theories of my own, of course, but I wanted to see what the greater community at large had to say about it.

I was also frustrated by the surveys that had been done up to this point. Through my decade plus of blogging I’d been contacted by a number of individuals purporting to be in the midst of doing surveys of the ABDL community - they wanted help, i.e. publicity through my blog. I was all too happy to post their link - anything that has the potential to benefit the community gets free advertising on Abysitter.com - but I was discouraged by how many of these seemed to go nowhere. Several were students writing doctoral or masters-level dissertations, and would use the data for those. Each promised to share their findings with me so that I could share them with my readers, but none ever did. Some just disappeared - project abandoned, perhaps? - and one sent a link to a paper that had to be downloaded at a significant cost.

I also noted that most of those doing surveys on the community were themselves non-ABDLs. Their methodology might have been spot on, but their questions came from an outsider’s perspective. I set out to create a survey that might answer the questions that I had, as well as the questions that have been posed to me, by you, through the years.

I at first hoped to make the data public, downloadable through the tools provided to me by my survey partner. They make it easy to create PDFs containing lots of data for each question. Initially, I hoped to do that. I wasn’t prepared for the number of respondents who would take time out to do more than just check a box… many would answer the ‘other’ segment of the question, and those answers would be profoundly personal - and many of you would choose to share your stories with me and your identities. This would make a simple PDF conversion impossible without revealing your personal information to those outside my inner circle. As such, I decided to take the time to analyze the answers and provide much of that data here.

In 2018 I presented a class at CAPCON called The Origins of ABDL. It included a video listing lots of the data, and a discussion with a ton of personal anecdotes about your own origin stories. The class ran over by more than an hour, with so many people having so much to share. It was an amazing experience, easily one of the best experiences I’ve had as a member of this community, and I appreciate everyone who shared it with me.

What you’re about to read is a simple breakdown of the answers to all of the questions of this survey. What will come later is a more advanced analysis of each question, including many individual responses included. Please don’t visit this survey website just once - come back over time, as the information here is updated and expanded upon.

In the meantime, I want to thank everyone who took the time to answer the questions, or who helped publicize the survey. I hope that the data below is helpful to some people on their journey to self-discovery. I know some of it has been to me.

Gender

The vast majority of survey respondents were male: 86.49%. Females made up 4.83% of the responses. Genderfluid: 3.59%. Trans: 2.94% M to F, 1.31% F to M, for a total of 4.25%. Also, 13 people declined to state their gender at all.

Age

If the survey responses are to be believed, our community skews young. More than 15% of respondents state that the were under 21; over 60% said they were under 30 years of age. The numbers trailed off after that: 23.73% in their 30s, 6.36% in their 40s; and 6.04% in their 50s. And 60 or above? Just 2.89 percent.

Interestingly, respondents who identified as being under 18 numbered nine, for a total of 0.58%.

Also of note: those who identified as trans tended to skew young: 24.25% were under 21, 68.19% were under 30, and only 9.11% were 40 or older.

Location

North America saw the largest percentage of respondents by far, with 78.62% hailing from the United States or Canada [US: 70.74%; Canada: 7.88%]. A close runner-up to Canada for numbers: the UK, with 7.30% of survey responses. Australia had 48 respondents; Germany 33; the Netherlands 16; France 14; New Zealand 13; and Norway 11. The remainder of the countries represented were in the single digits.

This is a vast difference from our community on Fetlife, where a huge percentage seem to hail from Antarctica. (LOL)

Relationship Status

Probably not surprisingly, one place our community appears to struggle is in forming relationships.

More than half of survey respondents acknowledged being single [52.49% total, 39.54% looking for a relationship and 12.95% not].

Monogamously-coupled, vanilla relationships accounted for 22.13% of responses, while monogamously-coupled ABDL relationships made up 12.44%.

Only 10.97% said that they were in a ‘mommy/daddy/little’ relationship, although an additional 3.57% said they were in that type of relationship, albeit online-only.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Sexual Preference

It seems that our community has long had a flexibilty with sexual preference. I count dozens of ‘straight’ ABDLs who I’ve seen sharing photos of other guys in diapers. I myself have diapered guys who consider themselves heteroflexible - straight when it comes to life partners, but willing to expand their sexual experiences when it comes to kink.

According to the UCLA School of Law William Institute, just 4.5% of the population identifies as LGBT. (Other theories have this number as high as 1 in 10).

Of the respondents of my survey, 39.40% identified as homosexual, and 20.37% as bisexual. (Note: respondents could choose more than one response).

That’s a much higher percentage than society at large.

Part of the reason for this could be the fact that my blog shares my own experiences as a gay male. The survey was publicized on my blog, from my various social media accounts (Fetlife, Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, Diaper-Bois, etc.) and to my 1,000+-member mailing list. Could this have skewed the results? Undoubtedly.

On the other hand, our community has long had a significant population of LGBTQ+ members. It also has a number of heteroflexible members, individuals who primarily identify as heterosexual but who are open to gay experiences, as well.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Level of Education

I included questions on level of education and income in response to requests from members of the community who expressed a curiousness as to how ‘well-off’ our community at large.

Household Income

Persona

I was curious to know where people fall on the spectrum when it comes to their persona. As someone who’s dabbled in a bit of babysitting - abysitting, as it were - I’ve had this conversation many times. You’d be surprised how many people aren’t sure.

Respondents to the survey seemed to fall in the ‘toddler’ and ‘little’ categories: 32.33% and 23.20%, respectively, for a total of 55.53%. And 17.60% identified as ‘adult/same age’ - probably DLs and/or mommies/daddies. The rest of the responses ranged from infant (8.40%) to middles and teens (10.2%). There were also a ton of write-ins… I’ll update those later.

I’d included ‘dog years’ as an attempt at humor, and I regret that - I should have been very specific and said ‘diaperpups’ here. Only seven people chose this answer, which is surprising because my Twitter feed seems to be 110% puppies lately. If I ever re-do the survey, there were be more pup-centric questions. And less humor.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

ABDL Interests

Previously I’d asked respondents to choose one category for their persona. I wanted to find out more about their ABDL interests as well, to see what kind of crossover appeal various segments of our community had.

Probably not surprisingly, ‘diaper lover’ was an interest of 89.89% of survey respondents. ‘Adult baby’ captured 68% of respondents, and ‘little’ 62.67%.

On the caregiver side, 24.55% of respondents identified as daddies or mommies; 24.95% as ‘big bro’/’big sis’.

I also asked respondents to identify whether they had an interest in some more fringe-ish segments of the community - and they did. A full one-fifth identified as sissybabies; 15.17% as babyfurs; and 15.04% as puppies.

And another 52 wrote in their own segments - I’ll explore those more here in the future.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

ABDL Gear

I joined several of those who gave me input during the survey creation process in their curiosity as to how many members of our community are into ABDL vs. disposable, disposable vs. cloth, Pull-up style vs. traditional diapers, and etc., so I asked respondents to state which of the following they own. Not exactly hard-hitting stuff, but if you wondered how the community overall feels about onesies, etc., here you go…

Other Interests

Probably no surprise to anyone, the vast majority of survey respondents reported being into ‘wet’. With a community centered around diapers, that’s probably not unexpected. Watersports: 37.47%.

More than half of respondents reported an interest in ‘messy’.

A bit more surprising, to me at least, was that such a large percentage of respondents - 57.05% - reported an interest in humiliation. More than half reported an interest in spanking - 55.49% - and nearly half - 48.17% - into BDSM.

This raises some fascinating questions. Why do we have such a high interest in being humiliated… punished… and restrained (50.68%)… and is there a connection between this and our love for diapers?

Later, under Upbringing, respondents would be asked to think back to their memories from childhood. Only 22.89% recalled actually being humiliated for wetting; 17.75% remembered being punished for it. An even smaller number, 7.56%, said that they were punished with diapers for wetting.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question. I’ll also include a list of all of the interests people wrote in… its extensiveness will surprise you.

Upbringing

A popular theory of the origins of diaper fetish holds that those who engage in this type of behavior later in life begin an attraction to diapers early - the ‘attachment’ part of attachment theory - perhaps because they are neglected for any number of reasons and come to find diapers as a soothing, calming, comforting presence in their lives.

The reasons for ‘neglect’ can be many, from children raised in neglectful homes to children whose parents ascribe to the ‘Ferber’ method of parenting, i.e. ‘let the baby cry it out’. I’ve long wondered whether other factors - multiple birth babies, babies born into homes with many other children, etc. - could add to this.

The data surrounding this was, in my view, inconclusive. Only 15.26% of respondents reported being an ‘only child’. I also asked how many were the oldest, middle, and youngest, but as I allowed respondents to choose multiple answers, it was pointed out later that some may have been confused and selected all of the above, skewing the numbers.

Of 1,422 respondents who chose to answer this question, a mere 35 reported being twins - just 2.46%. Just two said they were triplets, and only one was a multiple birth baby. So much for that theory.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

I also wondered how much my own experience related to those of others in the community. If you’ve read my blog for a while, you know that I was adopted as an infant, after what was likely a tumultuous first few months. Did my lifelong love for diapers result from anything that happened to me during that time? And, if so, did my experiences mirror those of others?

I found that 4.82% of survey respondents reported being adopted, vs. 88.97% not. Only 1.83% reported being in the foster care system, a number I had thought would be higher.

I also found that 14.24% of respondents reported being raised in a single parent household, and 5.19% raised by someone other than a parent. While in no way equivalent to the data I collected, the U.S. Census Bureau’s most recent data suggested that the U.S. percentage of those living in a single parent household was closer to 31%.

First Experiences

I wanted to know more about the early experiences of our community.

It’s no secret that our community is exploding. It seems that new members are joining us on the daily. One theory suggests that, as children are kept in diapers later and later in life, more and more are affected by an ‘attachment’ to them.

More than half of respondents reported being out of diapers before kindergarten - the typical childhood development benchmark in the US - at 60.49%. Nearly 9% reported being bedwetters in high school, but only 6.55% said they were still wearing Pullups/diapers at age 10. [EXPAND: Is this data different for those under 21?]

I then broke the data down further by age.

Among respondents under 21 years of age, 44.98% reported that they were potty trained very early, and 62.68% said they were out of diapers before kindergarten. Only 6.70% identified as bedwetters into high school.

Among respondents over 40, 36.11% said that they were potty trained very early, and 58.33% said they were out of diapers before kindergarten. And 11.57% said they were bedwetters into high school.

If the data is correct, it indicates that, despite the ease with which parents can diaper their children later and longer, those in our community are actually being potty trained earlier. Go figure…

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

As mentioned above, a large percentage of respondents - 57.05% - reported an interest in humiliation. More than half reported an interest in spanking - 55.49% - and nearly half - 48.17% - into BDSM. Still, only 22.89% recalled actually being humiliated for wetting; 17.75% remembered being punished for it. An even smaller number, 7.56%, said that they were punished with diapers for wetting.

If you’ve been a long-time reader of my blog, you’ve read about my own antics as a little fetishist desperate to be put back into diapers. You may have seen my account of sneaking our stash of cloth diapers around age six. Later, I’d steal diapers belonging to my younger cousins. I’d even find a diaper at the side of the road and take it home. And I would, of course, manufacture my own diapers out of Hefty garbage bags, paper towels, and duct tape. Absorbent they were not, but they sure did help me achieve littlespace.

As an adolescent crafting trash bag pampz on my at-home assembly line, I often wondered what the fuck is wrong with me? Later, as nearly 1,600 responses to my survey began rolling in, I was surprised to learn that I was far from alone.

Far, far from alone…

The percentage of respondents who reported making homemade diapers was a whopping 67.70%!

Survey responses revealed that 62.37% had a longing to be put back into diapers - but only 15.04% dared ask. More than 17% faked bedwetting in the hopes of being diapered again. A larger number - 56.44% - chose to sneak diapers from siblings, and 35.93% stealing them from neighbors or even strangers.

Early Sexuality

One theory that’s often bandied around concerning the origins of kinks - and, I think, the one I am most in agreement with - is that early masturbatory experiences may impact fetishes later in life. That said, I wanted to find out if that might be true when it comes to ours.

My own experience bears this out, and I have heard from dozens of people whose experience almost mirrors mine during my 11+ years of blogging: neglected as an infant, rapid attachment developed to my diapers - my foster parent even noted it in a letter she wrote to my adoptive parents - and, later, my first experiences rubbing one out occurred in diapers - as did all my later experiences. Years later… diapersexual.

I asked respondents to share the details of their early sexual experiences. I knew that, for some, this would be a touchy subject - pun intended - so, like all of the other questions, answering the question was optional. And while a few members of the segment of our community who try to shut things down for everyone complained that the questions were ‘squick’ - whatever that means - most of the respondents answered these, and a very small percentage (2.04%) chose decline to state as an answer.

I was surprised by the fact that 57.67% of respondents said that their early experiences with masturbation didn’t involve diapers at all. Just 29.38 % of respondents reported wearing diapers during this time. (Another 12% or so couldn’t remember, declined to state, or chose ‘other’. 

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

I’ve also heard people in the community conjecture that the rise in our community’s numbers may have something to do with the fact that there are many more disposable diaper products, and training pant-style products, on the market now.

More than a third of all respondents (37.63%) said that their first masturbatory experiences did not involve diapers at all. Nearly the same amount, 38.83%, admitted to having fantasies related to diapers during this time.

I also asked respondents to remember how old they were when they began masturbating. The numbers essentially mirrored vanilla society at large - nothing surprising or revealing here.

Community Intro

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know how important the concept of keeping the community 18+ is to me. I’ve long advocated for a strict boundary between adults and children within the kink community. I’ve been referred to as the “18 and Up Nazi” and seen screenshots of people I considered friends mocking me for it. Over the years I feel like it’s an idea that has caught on across most of our community - I remember back in the early 2000s when at least 50% of the forum arguments on the topic seemed to advocate for ABDL being an ‘all ages’ affair, and these days it seems, to me at least, that the proponents of children in kink are still out there.

That didn’t stop many from beginning to network as children, though, it seems. Survey respondents were asked how old they were when they began networking with other ABDLs online, and 50.1% - more than half - acknowledged being under 18 in their first online experiences. Of those, 164 were 12 or 13, and another 277 14 or 15.

Holy fuck.

I then broke this down by sexual preference, age, and included data for trans respondents…

• Gay:
  12-13 10.41% 58
  14-15 18.31% 102
  16-17 20.29% 113 (49.1%)

• Straight:
  12-13 9.30% 36
  14-15 18.35% 71
  16-17 19.38% 75 (47.03%)

• Trans:
  12-13 13.56% 8
  14-15 25.42% 15
  16-17 16.95% 10 (55.93%)

• Under 21:
  12-13 22.49% 47
  14-15 25.84% 54
  16-17 33.01% 69
  Only 16.27 identified as having waited until they turned 18 to begin networking.

• 40 Or Over:
  12-13: 0% 0
  14-15: 1.83% 4
  16-17: 2.75% 6

For many of those respondents over 40, the internet had yet to exist when they were under 18, so networking was likely limited to a DPF mailing list; this almost assuredly accounts for the disparity in data here.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Survey respondents were also asked how old they were when they met another ABDL. Here, the percentage of those admitting meeting up as minors was much lower: just 10.58% said they were under 18 when they first met another ABDL.

That, to me, was a relief.

Surprisingly, 28.94% of survey respondents said they had never met another ABDL. I’ll explore more about that data later. Another 2.31% admitted they have no plans to meet anyone else in our community.

Early Interests

Respondents were asked when they first realized that they had an interest in diapers.

Here, I was hoping to determine what percentage of our community found their interest in diapers going back to early childhood - supporting the attachment theory - and what part became interested later.

More than half of respondents acknowledged that they had always been interested in diapers, at 52.16%. I picture this segment of the community as being like me, desperately seeking out diapers after they were taken away, sneaking siblings’ diapers, and etc.

A smaller number said that they’d become interested in diapers later: 13.62% as children or adolescents, 15.01% as teens, and 5.17% in high school. (Looking back, most high school students are teens, so this question was not constructed in the most effective way… if I could get a re-do I’d change the breakdown of categories here).

With more than half not even being able to remember when they became interested in diapers, and another third acknowledging an interest in diapers as high schoolers or earlier, that left just 14.04% who developed an interest in college (4.40%) or as adults (7.12%).

To me, these numbers make it plain as day that our interest in diapers, for the most part, originates as a young age. A very small number of become adults and start exploring the world of paraphilic infantilism.

“Why would an adult choose to wear diapers?” is a question we often hear, both from well-meaning loved ones who have discovered our secret and, frankly, from each other.

The survey results seem to indicate that very few adults choose diaper, at all. Our attraction to them typically begins much earlier in life.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

SIDE NOTE… I am fascinated with those who did become infantilists well into adulthood, and I’d like to know more. If you are one of the 102 respondents who reported joining us after you grew up, please send me your thoughts?

I broke this down by category, as well:

• Gays were three times more likely to be converted in their later years (college, adult) than those who identified as heterosexual.

• Homosexuals College: 5.38% (30); Adult: 9.14% (51) - for a total of 14.48%

• Heterosexuals: College 3.61% (14)’ Adult (3.61%) (14) - for a total of 7.22%

The reasons for this aren’t clear, but I’d be interested in exploring more.

• Trans College 8.33% (5)
  Adult 8.33% (5) 16.66% TOTAL

Respondents were also asked to state whether they had discovered their interests on their own, or had been ‘turned on’ to diapers by another person. Here, the numbers were clear: 87.75% traced their interest in diapers back to themselves. Only 4.06% said that another person - a partner or friend - got them interested in diapers.

Respondents were asked to list up to five websites that most influenced their journey to ABDL self-discovery.

Here, DailyDiapers.com was the clear winner, with nearly half [49.33%] of respondents listing it as among their introductory experiences into the community. Tumblr came in second, with 38.92% - please note that this survey was administered prior to Tumblr’s new policy on adult content taking effect - and Deeker took the bronze, with 37.15% admitting to frequenting that site in its hayday.

Next, for curiosity’s sake, I broke the data down by sexual preference and age.

• Among those who identified as homosexual, Diaper-bois was the front-runner at 50.36%, followed by Tumblr (41.55%), Deeker’s Diaper Page (41.01%), Daily Diapers (37.59%), and Aby.com (34.71%).

• Those who identified as heterosexual ranked their favorites in a different order: DailyDiapers was first (61.80%), ADISC (35.28%), DPF (33.95%), Deeker (32.63%), and Tumblr (31.83%).

• Among those under 21, Tumblr ranked first at 71.57%, followed by DailyDiapers (45.59%), ADISC (38.73%), Reddit (30.88%), and Instagram (18.14).

• Among those over 40, DPF was #1 (61.29%, followed by Aby.com (47.00%), Deeker (41.01%), DailyDiapers (38.71%, and Diaper-Boys (33.64%).

NOTE: You can read more about the history of our community at whyABDL.org/history.

Mental Health

Respondents were asked to identify whether they are affected by mental health issues. Nearly half of survey respondents identified as having been diagnosed with depression (47.90%), and 41% stated that they suffered from anxiety. When it came to suicide, 28.58% had considered it, and 11.0% said they had actually carried out an attempt.

Then I broke it down based on a number of different categories, including sexual preference and trans vs. cisgender respondents.

• Heterosexuals were more likely to identify as having been diagnosed with depression or anxiety, and were nearly three times as likely to have attempted suicide, than heterosexuals.

• Those who identified as trans were far more likely to identify as having been diagnosed with depression or anxiety, and were five times as likely to have attempted suicide than those who identified as cisgender and heterosexual.

• For those who identified as homosexual: depression (47.95%), anxiety (43.84%), considered suicide (29.29%), attempted suicide (12.50%).

• For those who identified as heterosexual: depression (36.63%), anxiety (31.02%), considered suicide (18.45%, attempted suicide (4.28%).

For those who identified as trans: depression (66.67%), anxiety (77.19%), considered suicide (50.88%), and attempted suicide (22.81%).

Cisgender: depression (45.74%), anxiety (38.67%), considered suicide (26.37%), and attempted suicide (9.89%).

Cisgender/heterosexual: depression (35.99%), anxiety (31.32%), considered suicide (18.68%), attempted suicide (4.40%).

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Autism

When I put out requests for suggestions as to what people in the community wanted to know about their community, autism was a popular choice. The responses explain why: 3.48% identified themselves as having been diagnosed with autism, and 5.51% as having an Asperger’s Syndrome diagnosis, but a whopping 18.20% stated they suspect they’re on the spectrum.

On the other hand, 74.91% identified as having no connection with any of these.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, 1.7% of the overall population is diagnosed with Autism.

While the numbers are difficult to pin down, the Aspergers/Autism Network believes that 1 in 250 people have Asperger’s Syndrome. If this is true, and our community were to be a mirror image of society at large, we should expect that no more than six of our survey responses would yield a positive result to the Asperger’s Syndrome question. Instead, we had 76 positive responses.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Substances

Other interests represented to me by blog readers included questions about what percentage of the community have battled addictions, and what percentage use marijuana.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Quality of Life

Another popular request - and something I’ve often wondered myself: how does our community view the effect diapers have had on the quality of their life, relationships, and friendships.

These questions are tricky.

I asked respondents to rate the effect being an ABDL has had on their life overall on a scale of 1 to 10, with ‘1’ being life ruiner and ‘10’ being love diapers, love life. A very small number rated diapers as having a life-ruining, or even negative, effect on their life: just 6 (out of 1,389 who answered this question) rated it a ‘1’, and 5 rated it a ‘2’. In fact, all answers between 1 and 5, the lower half of the spectrum, totaled 17.93%.

I found this to be encouraging.

A full quarter of our community rated it a 10, equally encouraging. I like to think of us as really benefiting from this ‘affliction’, as opposed to suffering from it.

The average rating for this question was 7.5.

Just for curiosity’s sake, I broke it down further by several categories.

• Those who identified as being homosexual gave this a 7.7 rating. 26.22% of them rated it highest, and 0 rated it lowest.

• Those who identified as heterosexual rated it 7.1.

• Those who identified it as trans rated it 7.2. 0 rated it lowest.

• Those under 21 rated it 7.3. 0 rated it lowest.

• Those 40 or over rated it a 7.8%. 1 rated it lowest. 

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

I also inquired as to whether ABDL has had a mainly positive, or negative, effect on respondents social lives.

More than half the community rated this as neutral, which wasn’t surprising to me.

Next up: 26.38% said that it was mainly positive - some friends in the ABDL community, and 15.10% said it was positive - many friends in the ABDL community. This means that 41.48% of our community is using the community to its advantage.

That, plus the 52.56% rating it as ‘neutral’, totaled 94.04%.

Just 4.46% rated it as negative - ruins friendships, and 1.44% as extremely negative.

To be frank, I expected the negatives to be much higher on this. The responses to this question, if taken alone, appear to show a community that is very comfortable socially.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

I wanted to explore ABDL friendships a bit more, as well. I asked respondents to explain how their ABDL friendships compare to non-ABDL friendships. Nearly one-third of respondents said that they felt that it was the same. The full percentage for each answer:

6.66% - I find it very difficult to bond with other ABDLs.

10.14% - I find it easier to become close with people who are NOT a member of this community.

12.44% - I find it easier to become close with other ABDLs.

12.95% - I find a level of closeness in this community I could never experience anywhere else.

31.31% - I would say it’s the same.

15.54% - I struggle to make friends within this community or outside of it - diapers make no difference.

10.95% - Other

I also asked respondents to rate the effect being an ABDL has had on their relationships, with ‘1’ being a relationship wrecker and ‘10’ being makes my relationship.

Not surprisingly, the average rating here was lower than the effect on respondents’ social lives: 5.8% overall.

More than half of respondents - 51.73% - rated it a negative 1-5. (That was as opposed to just 17.93% of 1-5 responses for the diapers effecting social life question). Less than 10% gave it the highest rating possible.

This one, too, is broken down by a number of categories…

• Those who identified as homosexual gave this a 6.0 rating.

• Those who identified as heterosexual rated it 5.4.

• Those who identified as trans gave it a 6.0.

• Those under 21 rated it 6.0.

• Those over 40 rated it 5.9.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Binging, Purging & Ghosting

Our community has a ghosting problem. With this survey, I was presented the opportunity to ask questions of both those who purge, and those who don’t… and, to ask those who ghost, and those who have been affected by it.

For those unaware, ‘ghosting’ refers to those who essentially vanish - think invisible, like a ghost. It may be as simple as an ABDL friend who simply doesn’t reply for long periods at a time, or it may be someone who tries to shut out the entire community, deleting their profiles, blocking others on messengers, and more.

Purging refers to that period where ABDLs, often confronting feelings of guilt or shame over the pleasure diapers, littlespace, pupspace, etc. bring them, try to shed this side of themselves; it is often marked with giving away (or throwing away) items related to the fetish.

Nearly half of all respondents - 48.77% - admitted to purging when younger. (This is common, as those first exploring this side of themselves often take time to come to terms with it). Another 16.67% said that they still purge, from every few weeks to once a year. More than a third (34.56%) said that they had never purged, a number that was higher than I expected.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

I also asked respondents to estimate how much of their ABDL investment they’ve lost during purges. As someone who’s been a ‘purge buddy’ several times, I’ve had hundreds of dollars worth of diapers and ABDL gear shipped to me for safekeeping on several occasions. (We spend a lot on this fetish, one of the factors that may lead to the guilty feelings and ‘purge’ behaviors in the first place). The answers below speak for themselves…

I also asked respondents to gauge the effect others ghosting had had on them. I was surprised by the number who said nobody had ever done it to them: 61.57%. Another 30.17% said that they’d become accustomed to it, or that it never bothered them to begin with. A very small number ranked it as devastating (2.39%) or negative (5.87%). This surprised me, because I’ve seen so much talk of this online and expected the numbers reflecting the negativity of ghosting/purging to be much higher.

Go-To Sites & Apps

Another question I’m often asked is “where can I find other ABDLs” or “what websites and apps is our community on?”

I’ve answered that question only to have people correct me with their own opinions, saying “Oh no, only old people use that website” or “that site is mostly ________”.

Still, with only so many platforms for ABDLs to congregate on, you’re bound to find people on - well, all of the above.

Still, I asked the question.

The most popular site or app, by far, was Tumblr, with 70.05% of respondents having a presence there. (Note: this survey was administered before the website announced their new policies unfriendly to adult content).

Fetlife was a distant second, with 44.06% of ABDLs saying they used that website.

Diaper-Bois.com and Reddit nearly tied for third, with less than a third of respondents identifying as being users of each. (Note: some respondents may have selected Reddit but be particularly active in the various ABDL subreddits there).

You can read the entire breakdown in the chart below.

I wanted to break it down further, by category. I chose the following:

• Homosexuals tended to be on Tumblr (77.90%), Diaper-bois (56.00%), Fetlife (41.90%), Facebook (16.38%), and DailyDiapers (13.52%).

• Heterosexuals were represented across Tumblr (60.72%), Reddit (47.63%), Fetlife (40.11%), DailyDiapers (32.03%), and ADISC (21.45%).

• Those who identified as trans rated Tumblr first (66.04%), very closely followed by Fetlife (64.15%), Reddit (32.08%), ADISC (15.09%), and DailyDiapers (11.32%).

• If you’re looking for the under 21 set, you’ll find them on Tumblr (79.37%, Reddit (41.27%), Fetlife (17.99%), ADISC (16.93%), and Instagram (16.93%).

• Over 40: Tumblr (53.66%), Fetlife (52.20%), Diaper-Bois (44.39%), DailyDiapers (28.78%), and Facebook (19.51%).

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

ABDL Socialization

I wanted to know more about how our community socialized.

I was surprised by the number of ABDLs who reported being married to another ABDL - this was 9.59%, a number I thought would be much lower. (I know a few ABDLs who have married other ABDLs myself, but definitely didn’t think it was even close to 10%.

I wasn’t surprised at all by the fact that 36.65% reported never having met another ABDL, or that another 18.29% hadn’t met anyone in a long, long time. I have been blogging for more than a decade, and in that time I’ve gotten hundreds of messages from blog readers. So many of them mention never having met anyone, and for a number of reasons: geographical isolation, fear of the unknown, binge/purge factors, and etc. The fact that 55% of the community had never met, or hadn’t met anyone in a long time, was something I expected.

I was curious to know how many ABDLs people had met, on average. This question excluded events and conventions, and was more for 1:1 or small group meetings. You’ll note that one-third stated they’d never met another ABDL, and 3.26% had never, and planned to never. On the other hand, more than one-fifth of respondents (21.78%) reported having met more than 10! There’s some real socializing going on out there…

And just because why not, I asked how many ABDLs each respondent had met up with at one time; this also excluded events and cons.

I asked respondents to share their experiences in attending events, from local munches to nation-wide conventions.

I broke the responses down into categories here, as well.

75.39% of those under 21 had never attended an event but would like to, and an additional 13.61% had never attended one and did not plan to.

A very small number had been to CAPCON (2) or TeddyCon (1).

40.98% over those over age 40 had never attended an event but would like to, and 7.80% had not and had no plans to.

Overall, only 4.64% of all respondents had attended CAPCON, and just 3.07% TeddyCon. This surprised me, as a five-time CAPCON attendee, because I find the number of ABDLs at those events to be overwhelming… imagine that only being 4.64% of the community?!

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Goals

Some of the feedback I got during the survey creation process: what sort of goals did our community have?

For the questions below, respondents could choose as many goals as they wanted.

I was surprised that only 60% said that they wanted to make an ABDL friend - this community is so much more fulfilling with friends in it, I think. Even more surprising, just over one-third said they hoped to attend a local event or a con.

I’d love to understand more about why these numbers are lower than I expected.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.

Community Issues

For the survey’s last question, I asked respondents to share what they considered to be the community’s biggest problems. They could choose all that apply.

And share they did…

Pedophiles (63%) and ‘creepers’ (61%) topped the list.

Minors in kink came in at 47%, and ageism and transphobia were high up on the list of the grievances, as well.

Body discrimination was considered to be a problem by 42.89% of survey respondents.

The top five overall was as follows:

• Pedos - 63.17%

• Creepers - 61.33%

• Minors in Kink - 47.69%

• Discrimination Based On Body Type - 42.84%

• Not Enough ABDLs Near Me - 39.45%

Ageism, diapers being too expensive, sexism, people trying to get ABDL stuff for free, and transphobia rounded out the top 10, overall.

It would be interesting, I thought, to see how the answers varied based on age, gender, and sexual orientation.

So I split off the answers to this question as follows…

Survey respondents who identified as homosexual saw it as follows:

• Pedos - 61.89%

• Creepers - 57.17%

• Discrimination Based on Body Type - 52.06%

• Minors In Kink - 48.33%

• Ageism - 45.97%

Also of note: 23.18% listed homophobia, and 21.61% transphobia.

Those who identified as heterosexual rated community issues as follows for their top five:

• Creepers - 65.715

• Pedos - 62.25%

• Not Enough Women - 45.53%

• Minors in Kink - 43.80%

• Not Enough ABDLs Near Me - 36.31%

Also of interest, 15.56% considered homophobia a problem; 14.99% transphobia; and 21.04% ageism.

Those who identified as trans ranked their top 5 as follows:

• Creeper - 74.51%

• Pedos - 70.59%

• Transphobia - 60.78%

• Minors in Kink - 56.86%

• Discrimination Based On Body Type - 54.90%

Also of interest, 41.18% named homophobia, and 23.53% ageism.

Those who were under 21 saw it similarly:

• Pedos - 73.80%

• Creepers - 64.71%

• Minors in Kink - 52.41%

• Diapers Too Expensive - 49.73%

• Not Enough ABDLs Near Me - 44.39%

Also of interest: 31.02% ageism; 27.27% discrimination against minors in kink; 25.67% controlling diaper daddies; 25.13% transphobia.

Those over 40 saw it as follows:

• Pedos - 51.58%

• Ageism - 47.89%

• Creepers - 44.74%

• Discrimination Based On Body Type - 40.53%

• Not Enough ABDLs Near Me - 38.42%

Also of interest: 26.32% minors in kink; 19.47% too many people never reply to messages; 18.95% not enough ABDLs my age; 8.95% transphobia.

COMING SOON… I’ll be placing this section on its own separate page and including responses from a number of survey respondents regarding this question.